Dig a Little Deeper or Inelim Biz Daha Derine

Last Wednesday, I got to see three of my five roommates (and an honorary roommate)! It was lucky that we got to be together before two of them left over the next two days. I am so excited for them to serve in the field and wish them success as they do the Lord's work! It was fun to take a picture and catch up on each other's lives. I am so thankful I got to see them before they went and before I leave the MTC next week!

One bizarre thing that happened this week happened on Friday, when people who didn't get their visas in my district got their reassignments (except the Macedonians who accidentally got forgotten, they get theirs this Friday). We all gathered together with cinnamon rolls and little sticky notes from the travel office which contained their reassignment. There were only two people who had gotten their reassignments, so they each went up to a podium and read where they were going. The first to go was an elder, he got up, opened his little sticky note, and announced he was going to the Arizona Phoenix Mission! My oldest brother Carston is currently serving there so I was freaking out! The next person was a sister, who was super nervous about where she was going. Her companions had already read the reassignment because she made the mistake of having them hold on to it so she could resist the temptation of opening it herself. Anyway, she got up to the podium and announced that she would be going to the Salt Lake City West Mission. I feel bad because we recorded both of their call openings and I was going insane in both of them because Jackson is currently serving in the Salt Lake City West mission. First of all, it is pretty rare for a family to have three missionaries out at once, but even more rare for two people from one of the missionaries district to get reassigned exactly where the other two are serving. It just reminded me of how much my older brothers have been an example to me in my life and I am so excited for these two missionaries in my district who get to see them.

Sundays are usually busy but fun days. We don't have tons of devotionals like the missionaries before us, but we do have something called the "Go and Do" experience. This is where we get about an hour and a half to just study more about one of three topics that change every week. This was my third time studying "Strengthening my Testimony of the Book of Mormon", which was pretty cool. I ended up learning more about my patriarchal blessing and spiritual gifts, which was super interesting to me. It is cool that even though everyone is studying the same topic, we each end up learning about different things that pertain to us individually. Later that night, we decided that we needed a snack because the MTC dinner didn't look too appetizing, so we decided to make microwave s'mores. We put marshmallows and chocolate in a bowl and made a s'more dip and then dipped our crackers in the dip. It was literally one of the best things I have eaten here, even though I know the whole thing sounds weird. We tried to heat one of the marshmallows up with an iron, but that didn't work out well. Also, no one wanted to eat that one because the iron touched other people's clothes and the marshmallow just looked questionable, so, naturally, one of the sisters ate it as a joke and regretted it immediately afterwards. So, that was a fun night.

The whole title of this email is due to my teacher playing the song "Dig a Little Deeper" from the Disney film "Princess and the Frog". However, it was in Turkish and it was one of the funniest things I have ever seen. The way Turkish translated into English is absolutely hilarious, so the title of the "Dig a Little Deeper" song in Turkish is "Inelim Biz Daha Derine", which means "Let's go Deeper". Anyway, I highly recommend listening to it. Overall, the songs message is sweet and I was glad that I got to watch it. It reminded me of my sisters and how fast they are growing as I am away. I love them so much and i am so grateful for them.

About a week before I got to the MTC, President Nelson and the Apostles were all at the MTC. So, Jackson got to see them and that was a cool experience for them. However, because they were all here that week, none of them have come to the MTC the whole time I have been here, which made last night special for me and my district. We had heard rumors all day that there would be an apostle at this devotional, but I kind of ignored them because there are always rumors. So, we went to dinner and some of the elders were being super vague about how they saw the speaker and how we should get to choir early. When the choir started, they announced that an apostle was going to be speaking at this devotional! I have loved the devotionals every week, but I was so excited to hear an apostle speak before I leave. It was David A. Bednar who came to speak with us, and he gave an incredible talk about repentance. It was amazing to hear from him and learn more about repentance and the role it should have in our daily lives. I learned some important things, but the most important one was that I should never be guilty of the sin of ingratitude. It has been a blessing to be here for these past couple of weeks because of the help I have gotten with Turkish, the relationships I have made in my district, and just seeing how I have changed since I got here. Overall, remember that God knows what is best for us. He knows our deepest thoughts and desires and he knows who we can become. Each of us has the divine potential to become like our Savior and Heavenly Parents, but the only way we can improve is by turning to God and the Savior alway, in all that we do. Please, remember that you are loved infinitely by Heavenly Parents, who made a plan for us to return to them in glory. I love my Savior and I am thankful for His Atonement. I love my Heavenly Parents and I will do all that I can to better trust in their Plan of Happiness for me.

I love you all! Thank you for your emails and for your prayers! I would like to end this email with a spiritual thought, just because I need to do better at that. This is from a talk by Elder D. Todd Christofferson called “As Many as I Love, I Rebuke and Chasten”.

"God uses another form of chastening or correction to guide us to a future we do not or cannot now envision but which He knows is the better way for us. President Hugh B. Brown, formerly a member of the Twelve and a counselor in the First Presidency, provided a personal experience. He told of purchasing a rundown farm in Canada many years ago. As he went about cleaning up and repairing his property, he came across a currant bush that had grown over six feet (1.8 m) high and was yielding no berries, so he pruned it back drastically, leaving only small stumps. Then he saw a drop like a tear on the top of each of these little stumps, as if the currant bush were crying, and thought he heard it say:

'How could you do this to me? I was making such wonderful growth. … And now you have cut me down. Every plant in the garden will look down on me. … How could you do this to me? I thought you were the gardener here.'

President Brown replied, “Look, little currant bush, I am the gardener here, and I know what I want you to be. I didn’t intend you to be a fruit tree or a shade tree. I want you to be a currant bush, and someday, little currant bush, when you are laden with fruit, you are going to say, ‘Thank you, Mr. Gardener, for loving me enough to cut me down.’”

Years later, President Brown was a field officer in the Canadian Army serving in England. When a superior officer became a battle casualty, President Brown was in line to be promoted to general, and he was summoned to London. But even though he was fully qualified for the promotion, it was denied him because he was a Mormon. The commanding general said in essence, 'You deserve the appointment, but I cannot give it to you.' What President Brown had spent 10 years hoping, praying, and preparing for slipped through his fingers in that moment because of blatant discrimination. Continuing his story, President Brown remembered:

'I got on the train and started back … with a broken heart, with bitterness in my soul. … When I got to my tent, … I threw my cap on the cot. I clenched my fists, and I shook them at heaven. I said, ‘How could you do this to me, God? I have done everything I could do to measure up. There is nothing that I could have done—that I should have done—that I haven’t done. How could you do this to me?’ I was as bitter as gall.

'And then I heard a voice, and I recognized the tone of this voice. It was my own voice, and the voice said, ‘I am the gardener here. I know what I want you to do.’ The bitterness went out of my soul, and I fell on my knees by the cot to ask forgiveness for my ungratefulness. …

'… And now, almost 50 years later, I look up to [God] and say, ‘Thank you, Mr. Gardener, for cutting me down, for loving me enough to hurt me.’”

One thing that as been emphasized to me while I have been here is that I need to let my will be swallowed in Heavenly Fathers. He knows what is best for me and my spiritual progression, so as I trust Him and let Him change me, I can be a better person, a better missionary, friend, daughter, sister, and so much more.

Sincerely,

Sister Calder

Some of the roommates and honorary roommates!

Map of where our branch and their family members are serving or served their mission.

Choir with Sienna and Alex

Sunday Evening devotional

Me, my companions, and the Bulgarian sisters after Elder Bednars devotional. From left to right it is Sister Duenas, Sister Madsen, Sister Stewart, Sister Woodford, Sister Haun, and Me (Sister Woodford, eho is speaking Turkish, and Sister Haun, who is speaking Macedonian, are my companions)